I gave the Little Lady formula today.
It broke my heart to do it. She's refused breast milk all day, and screamed herself hoarse when I've offered. She was starting to show signs of dehydration and she's not slept for longer than 40 mins at a time.
Now she's in her cot cooing to herself and slowly going to sleep, and I'm sat crying with breasts full of milk she doesn't want or seem to tolerate. And the only way to get rid of it is to use the bloody pump.
I don't know what to do now. I've eliminated dairy from my diet, but I'm only on the second day of that. Do I continue to try and give her breast milk knowing that it may be making her ill and causing her distress, or do I formula feed for a few days and freeze the milk I continue to pump for when she is older?
Or do I give up? I was prepared to pump if I had to. I was prepared to eliminate food from my diet if I had to. I wasn't prepared for both, nor for her simply refusing it. How far do I want to go when formula is a viable option?
2 comments:
This is my very delayed CONGRATULATIONS! Your little lady is one heck of a cutie pie and I'm amazed at how little babies are when they are born (especially looking at my little one).
Now...per milk...I would keep pumping (though decreasing the amount slowly as to not cause you discomfort -- the more you pump, the more you produce and end up engorged if there's no let down) and freezing the milk. Breast milk is brilliant and you can mix it with everything (e.g. rice cereal or baby cereal in the future when she's going onto solids). You might also want to give her a mix in the bottle: some breast milk and some formula.
If you're giving up foods, give it at least a couple of weeks (or even 30 days as one doctor told me) before the effect kicks in. A couple of days is definitely not enough. When I was told to give up dairy, it was for a whole month to check the effects. In the meantime, mark your breast milk with dates, so you know which ones could have still contained things that are making her unhappy.
Above all, don't beat yourself up about it. Keep pumping and give her formula if that's what she'll eat. Formula these days is very, very good (unless you live in China, apparently) and it'll make her grow and fill her tummy and make her happy. But I'd try mixing your milk with the formula. I know it's disappointing...things don't always turn out the way we'd want. I ended up having to go to formula because A would eat in 10 minute intervals which meant serious and dangerous sleep deprivation and possible depression for me. So, it was bottles at night and boobies in the day.
Congratulations again!
{{hugs}}
Do what you think is best for her *and* for YOU. If you are resenting pumping all the time to feed her EBM then perhaps formula is the way to go. The biggest thing is the time you spend holding her while you feed her, Sarah. You have not failed if she cannot latch on. In fact, you have done a marvelous job pumping all this time. It would wear on anyone.
Best wishes with your decision and know that no matter what you do, we are all behind you.
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