Due to the demands of parents, small boys and parents in law, the Baron and I have always had our own Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve. Just the two of us (and the pets acting as Turkey Guard).
This year is no different. I am wearing my apron and Christmas chef hat - Stuff the Turkey! - and I am halfway through my first bottle of Riesling. The house smells of garlic and rosemary stuffed turkey, and Harry Potter is on tv. We will exchange presents after midnight mass. Christmas has come, albeit a little early to this house.
So I wish you all a very Happy Christmas and I'll see you all on the other side. Have fun, be merry (or very merry) and Stuff the Turkey!
Showing posts with label Smeg. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Smeg. Show all posts
Saturday, 24 December 2005
Saturday, 21 May 2005
Bloody lucky
So I was driving along the QE2 bridge yesterday. Nice day, good views. Lots of traffic.
The car in front braked.
And I didn't.
There are several options when your car is heading towards a stationary object. You can brake and stop. Since I didn't notice the object in time, that wasn't a realistic option.
You can swerve and avoid the object. I was on a crowded bridge. That left only one option.
Smack into the back of the car in front.
Luckily for me I wasn't going very fast when I hit. Maybe 40 mph. But the impact was enough to turn my stereo off, and send everything in the car flying forward.
Hazards on, engine off, glares from the lane of traffic I have just brought to halt. Time to inspect the damage I wrought to my beloved little car, and the car I ploughed into.
Unbelievably there was not a mark to be seen. His car was intact. My car was intact. It did not seem possible that I just smacked into him. No dents, broken lights, marked bumpers or scratched paintwork.
So after exchanging pleasantries instead of insurance details, we parted and went our separate ways.
I swear I do not know where my mind is these days. If you see it, I could really do with it back.
The car in front braked.
And I didn't.
There are several options when your car is heading towards a stationary object. You can brake and stop. Since I didn't notice the object in time, that wasn't a realistic option.
You can swerve and avoid the object. I was on a crowded bridge. That left only one option.
Smack into the back of the car in front.
Luckily for me I wasn't going very fast when I hit. Maybe 40 mph. But the impact was enough to turn my stereo off, and send everything in the car flying forward.
Hazards on, engine off, glares from the lane of traffic I have just brought to halt. Time to inspect the damage I wrought to my beloved little car, and the car I ploughed into.
Unbelievably there was not a mark to be seen. His car was intact. My car was intact. It did not seem possible that I just smacked into him. No dents, broken lights, marked bumpers or scratched paintwork.
So after exchanging pleasantries instead of insurance details, we parted and went our separate ways.
I swear I do not know where my mind is these days. If you see it, I could really do with it back.
Wednesday, 27 April 2005
Bugger!
I am supposed to be heading to South London for a meeting about now.
One small problem..........I can't remember what time I am supposed to be there!
One small problem..........I can't remember what time I am supposed to be there!
Thursday, 7 April 2005
Sunday, 27 February 2005
Cousin It no more
I finally set foot inside a hairdresser's.
I hadn't had my hair cut in around ten months. And it showed. God, did it show! Remnants of fucking scarlet mixed in with Brazilian Brown. Split ends up to my ears and broken hairs from badly placed slides.
I don't really like going to the hairdressers. The mindless and artificial small talk that one is obliged to partake in pisses me off no end, and I always without fail forget to put in contact lens so I can see what they are doing. Plus the tea always tastes like crap.
And yesterday was no different.
Many moons ago I used to be a skinhead. I loved it - no buggering about in the morning with hairbrushes, hot brushes and other hair shit. Get out the shower and be ready to go.
Times change and hair grows. My hair had reached lengths not seen since primary school and had managed to cascade down my back, like a brown and scabby waterfall. It had to go.
I went in at the appointed time. I had no clue what I wanted, except to lose as much hair as possible.
The stylist was aghast at her mission.
"Cut off all your hair? Are you sure you want to do this? How about we go for a chin length bob and if you want it shorter, you can always come back"
I was determined, if vague about small matters such as style. The hair had to go. We flicked through some magazines to get an idea of what I wanted. And we found it.
Snip, snip, snip.
Hair piled up around our feet, despite the best efforts of the salon junior. I didn't get to see too much of the transformation as I was without glasses for most of it.
I put my glasses back on and looked in the mirror. Greeting me was someone I hadn't seen in years, and hadn't realised just how much I missed.
Me.
I hadn't had my hair cut in around ten months. And it showed. God, did it show! Remnants of fucking scarlet mixed in with Brazilian Brown. Split ends up to my ears and broken hairs from badly placed slides.
I don't really like going to the hairdressers. The mindless and artificial small talk that one is obliged to partake in pisses me off no end, and I always without fail forget to put in contact lens so I can see what they are doing. Plus the tea always tastes like crap.
And yesterday was no different.
Many moons ago I used to be a skinhead. I loved it - no buggering about in the morning with hairbrushes, hot brushes and other hair shit. Get out the shower and be ready to go.
Times change and hair grows. My hair had reached lengths not seen since primary school and had managed to cascade down my back, like a brown and scabby waterfall. It had to go.
I went in at the appointed time. I had no clue what I wanted, except to lose as much hair as possible.
The stylist was aghast at her mission.
"Cut off all your hair? Are you sure you want to do this? How about we go for a chin length bob and if you want it shorter, you can always come back"
I was determined, if vague about small matters such as style. The hair had to go. We flicked through some magazines to get an idea of what I wanted. And we found it.
Snip, snip, snip.
Hair piled up around our feet, despite the best efforts of the salon junior. I didn't get to see too much of the transformation as I was without glasses for most of it.
I put my glasses back on and looked in the mirror. Greeting me was someone I hadn't seen in years, and hadn't realised just how much I missed.
Me.
Thursday, 24 February 2005
There be snow!
The weather forecast actually got it right.
My newly dug garden is buried under a thick blanket of snow. And it is fucking freezing!
Now whose bright idea was it to move to the top of a hill in the middle on nowhere?
My newly dug garden is buried under a thick blanket of snow. And it is fucking freezing!
Now whose bright idea was it to move to the top of a hill in the middle on nowhere?
Sunday, 23 January 2005
As if things couldn't get any worse
The Baron is in a lot of pain, and can barely turn his head, let alone walk. I just fused all the lights upstairs. And to top things off........
Harvey is missing. It is snowing and it is dark.
I hate this miserable fucking weekend.
Harvey is missing. It is snowing and it is dark.
I hate this miserable fucking weekend.
Extremely close call
The Baron was knocked down by a speeding fork lift truck at work at lunchtime yesterday.
He was thrown a good fifteen feet through the air when it hit him (at about thirty miles an hour) and landed on his side, by the side of the truck where it finally had come to a stop.
He was knocked out on impact.
When he finally came to, he was taken, not to hospital as one might expect, but up to the first aid room to sign various pieces of paperwork. After an hour and a half they finally took him to hospital, which is where I was called from.
After lots of tests, X-rays and observation he was released late night. He has whiplash, scrapes from the forks, mild concussion, and severe bruising around his bones on the right side (which took the impact). He is understandably very sore, and is having a lot of trouble getting around.
He has been signed off indefinitely to heal. The leniency (trust me, this is leniency as opposed to common decency) comes from the fact it was the worst accident to date at the warehouse (and was also witnessed by a large number of staff) and that the driver of the fork lift truck was on his final warning for speeding.
Guess what he is most pissed off about?
The fact he has nary a scrape on his body! There are a couple of scrapes on his back, and that is it.
The doctor said that he must be made of steel to have walked away with so few injuries. It's true. He's never broken a bone in his body, so why start now when you get knocked over?
Very scary few hours.
Apologies for the drama. I wasn't given any information over the phone other than the name of the hospital and the fact that he had been knocked down, and of course I immediately assumed the worst.
He was thrown a good fifteen feet through the air when it hit him (at about thirty miles an hour) and landed on his side, by the side of the truck where it finally had come to a stop.
He was knocked out on impact.
When he finally came to, he was taken, not to hospital as one might expect, but up to the first aid room to sign various pieces of paperwork. After an hour and a half they finally took him to hospital, which is where I was called from.
After lots of tests, X-rays and observation he was released late night. He has whiplash, scrapes from the forks, mild concussion, and severe bruising around his bones on the right side (which took the impact). He is understandably very sore, and is having a lot of trouble getting around.
He has been signed off indefinitely to heal. The leniency (trust me, this is leniency as opposed to common decency) comes from the fact it was the worst accident to date at the warehouse (and was also witnessed by a large number of staff) and that the driver of the fork lift truck was on his final warning for speeding.
Guess what he is most pissed off about?
The fact he has nary a scrape on his body! There are a couple of scrapes on his back, and that is it.
The doctor said that he must be made of steel to have walked away with so few injuries. It's true. He's never broken a bone in his body, so why start now when you get knocked over?
Very scary few hours.
Apologies for the drama. I wasn't given any information over the phone other than the name of the hospital and the fact that he had been knocked down, and of course I immediately assumed the worst.
Saturday, 22 January 2005
Sunday, 17 October 2004
Moving Day minus 12
Everything is packed bar the computer. The house is clean, the cars are loaded and we are ready to go.
This is DMouse. Over and out.
This is DMouse. Over and out.
Friday, 8 October 2004
More counting
10 days to go to the move.
9 days until the cats are in cattery.
8 days until my sister buggers off to Tenerife and leaves me the Boy.
7 boxes packed.
6 cats driving me to the brink of madness.
5 working days left before my leave starts.
4 cat baskets to de-hair.
3 reports to write this weekend.
2 cans of diet coke left.
1 nervous breakdown underway.
Help!
9 days until the cats are in cattery.
8 days until my sister buggers off to Tenerife and leaves me the Boy.
7 boxes packed.
6 cats driving me to the brink of madness.
5 working days left before my leave starts.
4 cat baskets to de-hair.
3 reports to write this weekend.
2 cans of diet coke left.
1 nervous breakdown underway.
Help!
Thursday, 30 September 2004
Thursday, 23 September 2004
Oh dear!
I washed the Baron's mobile phone.
I put it through the economy cycle. Forty degree's.
It is very clean.
I put it through the economy cycle. Forty degree's.
It is very clean.
Thursday, 2 September 2004
The Counting Game
One recovered kitty.
Two piles of washing waiting to be washed.
Three reports to write.
Four other kitties driving me mad.
Five bags of shopping to put away.
Six weeks until we move.
Seven cooked chicken breasts in the fridge (leftover from my sister's BBQ) that I need to use up.
Eight reviews scheduled between now and moving.
Nine e-mails I need to answer.
Ten minutes until my dinner is cooked.
Perhaps it is time to stop reading my bookmarked sites!
Two piles of washing waiting to be washed.
Three reports to write.
Four other kitties driving me mad.
Five bags of shopping to put away.
Six weeks until we move.
Seven cooked chicken breasts in the fridge (leftover from my sister's BBQ) that I need to use up.
Eight reviews scheduled between now and moving.
Nine e-mails I need to answer.
Ten minutes until my dinner is cooked.
Perhaps it is time to stop reading my bookmarked sites!
Thursday, 24 June 2004
Thursday, 1 April 2004
Samson
Samson, the deranged and rather large rottweiler, had a loopy fit today.
He took a minor dislike to a poodle, and decided that he would quite like to eat him. So he tried.
Yappy poodle is fine. Samson has damaged his back claws in chasing him and has bled all over the floor.
Mum couldn't hold on to him when he took off. She fell down when Sam pulled and has grazed her hands quite badly. She also bled all over the floor.
I tried to clean everyone up, and slipped over on all the blood. Hit the floor, banged my knee and have reinjured my tendon (damaged after the Boy's birthday party incident).
Needless to say, everyone is feeling somewhat sorry for themselves this evening. The dog is skulking around in the kitchen, my mum is nursing her hands and I have returned home for some peace and quiet. Hasn't really worked out.
I've just been out chasing a Harvey Cat down from a tree. When he realises I am out to retrieve him, he shimmies up a tree. He hasn't yet figured out that without the leaves, I can see exactly where he is. Silly boy.
So I have another four hours of peace before the Baron returns home from work. I will of course be in bed by then. Having the house to myself is nice, but it is getting a little boring and lonely. I go and see my sister some evenings, but I really don't like coming back to a dark and empty house.
What shall I do this evening?
He took a minor dislike to a poodle, and decided that he would quite like to eat him. So he tried.
Yappy poodle is fine. Samson has damaged his back claws in chasing him and has bled all over the floor.
Mum couldn't hold on to him when he took off. She fell down when Sam pulled and has grazed her hands quite badly. She also bled all over the floor.
I tried to clean everyone up, and slipped over on all the blood. Hit the floor, banged my knee and have reinjured my tendon (damaged after the Boy's birthday party incident).
Needless to say, everyone is feeling somewhat sorry for themselves this evening. The dog is skulking around in the kitchen, my mum is nursing her hands and I have returned home for some peace and quiet. Hasn't really worked out.
I've just been out chasing a Harvey Cat down from a tree. When he realises I am out to retrieve him, he shimmies up a tree. He hasn't yet figured out that without the leaves, I can see exactly where he is. Silly boy.
So I have another four hours of peace before the Baron returns home from work. I will of course be in bed by then. Having the house to myself is nice, but it is getting a little boring and lonely. I go and see my sister some evenings, but I really don't like coming back to a dark and empty house.
What shall I do this evening?
Friday, 12 March 2004
How long this time?
Lets see how long I have before my laptop boots me out again......
The house remains unsold. We have our fifth viewing tomorrow, and it has only been five days, so I don't think I need worry yet.
I have found a house I like, but the Baron remains unconvinced.
It is snowing still. I don't know what is up with the weather.
The furballs are as furry as ever. They don't like the snow much.
The Baron shaved his head last night so he isn't particularly furry. At least this time he did it in the bathroom. He did take all the hot water though, so my shower this morning was on the chilly side.
And there goes the terminal system error.......bye!
The house remains unsold. We have our fifth viewing tomorrow, and it has only been five days, so I don't think I need worry yet.
I have found a house I like, but the Baron remains unconvinced.
It is snowing still. I don't know what is up with the weather.
The furballs are as furry as ever. They don't like the snow much.
The Baron shaved his head last night so he isn't particularly furry. At least this time he did it in the bathroom. He did take all the hot water though, so my shower this morning was on the chilly side.
And there goes the terminal system error.......bye!
Friday, 13 February 2004
More madness
You'd think that after my blood test debacle that I would know what day it was. You would think that.
Nope. No clue at all.
I thought it was Saturday this morning. So I didn't get up and go to work. I turned off the alarm and went back to my blissful slumber.
Whoops.
I realised at 9am that it was in fact Friday and I was supposed to be in a meeting at 10am. Cue the fastest shower and breakfast ever, followed by a breakneck dash to the station. Where the train was sat at the platform, due to delays further down the line.
Bugger.
Nope. No clue at all.
I thought it was Saturday this morning. So I didn't get up and go to work. I turned off the alarm and went back to my blissful slumber.
Whoops.
I realised at 9am that it was in fact Friday and I was supposed to be in a meeting at 10am. Cue the fastest shower and breakfast ever, followed by a breakneck dash to the station. Where the train was sat at the platform, due to delays further down the line.
Bugger.
Sunday, 14 December 2003
Time is leaving me behind
I still haven't done my damn nails, and it is my first day tomorrow!
I did try to get started, but the smell of the varnish made me feel crap so I left it. I don't wear false nails, all I need to do is manicure them and paint them. Nothing fancy.
In fact, I did bugger all last night except fall asleep on the sofa with Ellie and Frankie. The Baron locked Harvey in the bathroom and I didn't realise for an hour! He was very relieved when I retrieved him.
The Baron called at 11pm to say that the coach picking them up would arrive there at 12.30, so he would be home by 1.30AM. Great. Except then he told me that he had forgotten his keys, so could I please wait up for him to let him in. Bastard. And he didn't get home until 2AM.
Today I have last minute cleaning planned. I need to finish the washing, but I only have two more loads to do. I must clear off my desk so it is useable, and I need to gather all the requested documents for tomorrow. Oh, and get directions. I need those! I get lost at the drop of a hat.
Better press on. Too much to do, and it is already 9.30AM. I'm still in my pyjama's and we haven't even had breakfast.
I did try to get started, but the smell of the varnish made me feel crap so I left it. I don't wear false nails, all I need to do is manicure them and paint them. Nothing fancy.
In fact, I did bugger all last night except fall asleep on the sofa with Ellie and Frankie. The Baron locked Harvey in the bathroom and I didn't realise for an hour! He was very relieved when I retrieved him.
The Baron called at 11pm to say that the coach picking them up would arrive there at 12.30, so he would be home by 1.30AM. Great. Except then he told me that he had forgotten his keys, so could I please wait up for him to let him in. Bastard. And he didn't get home until 2AM.
Today I have last minute cleaning planned. I need to finish the washing, but I only have two more loads to do. I must clear off my desk so it is useable, and I need to gather all the requested documents for tomorrow. Oh, and get directions. I need those! I get lost at the drop of a hat.
Better press on. Too much to do, and it is already 9.30AM. I'm still in my pyjama's and we haven't even had breakfast.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)